Need A Laugh?

Up a Creek...

Brown is the color of dirt. Dirt reminds me of Dirty Jobs. Both of these clips are dirty but not in the same sense. Enjoy! I hope you have enjoyed color week, make sure you check out Caity's blog for her colors from the past week.

Going Up?

I have noticed that quite a few elevator buttons light up red when pressed, which is a good thing for me as today's color is red and I have a few elevator stories.


The first story happened a few days ago when I was leaving work. I got into the elevator and pressed 4. Only problem was that I was already on the 4th floor so the elevator doors just closed and I sat inside, all by myself, and waited. I am sure it didn't take me long to figure out what had gone wrong, it just felt like an eternity, and I was glad I was the only one in the lift. I then pressed B made sure that the button turned red and continued on my way only slightly embarrassed. Only slightly as this was not the first (nor the last I am sure) time that this had happened to me.


But this incident reminded me of another elevator escapade. I was working downtown in a large office building and like many other office drones I took the train in. I mention the train because many of my co-workers took the train and we all got to work at the same time resulting in a mad dash for the elevators. There were quite a few elevators in this building, six cars I believe, but only 2 seemed to work in the morning causing a pile up of people in the lobby. On this day I waited in line and got into an elevator when the time came, pressed 11 and moved to the back of the car to allow more people to get in. Now 11 floors is not a lot but it takes awhile to get there when you are stopping at every floor, so I was off in my own little world when I noticed that the doors were closing. Out of the corner of my eye I caught the number 11 that is displayed on the wall of the floor so you know where you are. This being my floor, and not in the mood to go up to 18, I flung my arm out the door to stop it from closing. Then I made some odd noise that was clearly not English to try to apologize for my lack of attention. This noise only resulted in the other people in the car being made aware of the fact that I was an idiot and didn't know what floor I worked on. Yes, that is exactly what their faces said as I watched the doors close after I made my embarrassing escape.


Now on to my favorite elevator story. It was a rainy day and a co-worker and myself were walking back to our office from a meeting the next building over. My co-worker had an umbrella and had started taking it down as we walked to the elevator. As we approached, the doors to one of the elevators was closing and my co-working wanting to get back to work stuck out her umbrella to stop the closing doors. The umbrella worked but the motion of stopping the doors caused the umbrella to spring open inside the elevator. Once the doors fully opened we saw a very well dressed man inside the car and much to our surprise he was now coated in little water droplets from head to toe. Like I said it was a rainy day. My co-worker apologized for the light shower that was bestowed upon this man while I hit 13 and the doors closed. The man did not say one word on our journey to the 13th floor and once we exited the car my co-worker and I could not contain our laughter any longer and both burst into laughs before the doors and fully closed. I am sure the man heard us laughing but perhaps next time he will hold the lift or risk another umbrella shower. We laughed for a good 10 minutes and disrupted the rest of the floor with our laughter but we just couldn't contain ourselves, it was all just so surreal.

Mellow Yellow

Feeling Green

Tuesday is Green and I must say that I am feeling Green today (yesterday since this will post tomorrow) as I think I have the flu or something along those lines. So I am taking the easy way out and just giving you one picture today, that to mean represents green. The old saying goes that the hill is always greener on the other side. This picture reminds me that the hill is green no matter where you find it as long as you keep looking. I am sure I am not making much sense; like I said I am feeling green.

Blue Pictures

As part of Caity's challenge, today's color is blue and to go along with it are some pictures that I think could be described as blue or blue-ish in nature. Enjoy!

This was a mural above an entrance on La Salle Dr, Chicago

Blue Fish (and friends) and Blue Water, Maui.

The Big Blue Wet Thing, Cancun.

The unique blue sky of Zion Nat'l Park.

Week In Colors

My friend Caity came across this idea. So in accepting her challenge I will be doing posts this week that have something to do with the color for that day. It might just be a color in a picture or a story that reminds me of that days color or something else all together. It should be fun and if you want to play along just click on "idea" above for a link to the instructions on Caity's blog.

History

No matter who you voted for, today we were all a witness to history being made. That is pretty cool.

Utah Auto Expo

Did I go to the Utah Auto Expo this weekend? Do you even have to ask. Did I go twice? Yes, yes I did. Every year this show gets the new car bug out of my system, which if you really know me is a good thing or I would have a new car every three months. I just love the smell of new cars and that smell alone seems to calm the bug every year. So it is a good thing, here are some highlights from this years show:

And if I had any desire to get a new car after all these this sticker price put an end to that (look at the bottom of the sticker!):

Waiting for My Bailout

Dear IRS,

It has come to our attention that you still show my status as a for profit organization. Please be aware that recent financial and economic situations have left me as a non profit organization. As such I would appreciate you adjusting your taxes from a for profit to a non profit.

You see, I am no longer turning a profit and I know that you have given billions to other institutions that have stopped posting profits. While I wait for my bailout I would very much appreciate a tax exempt status enjoyed by other non profit organizations. Once my bailout check is received I will be happy to switch back over to a for profit organization or grant you stock options in my organization, whichever you prefer.

Thank you for your consideration to this request.

The 2009 NAIAS-Detroit Auto Show

This past week saw the start of the North American International Auto Show, or Detroit Auto Show. I have always wanted to go to this show as it always has a ton of far out concept cars that would make anyone want to trade their current car in for one with the latest features. Here a few of the vehicles showing up at this years show. To see all the cars making the rounds click here.

2010 Buick LaCrosse

Cadillac Converj Concept

2010 Cadillac SRX

Chrysler 200C Concept

Dodge Circuit EV Concept

2010 Ford Taurus

Volvo S60 Concept

A Little Different

And now for something a little different...

The New JPSally!

Me and JPSally go back. When the Grand Cherokee was first introduced in the early 90's I wanted one. Sadly over the years I came to realize that the GC was very much out of my price range and settled for a hand me down Plymouth Grand Voyager which shuttled many friends to and from school until dying one night on my way home from work. I coasted all the way down 9400 South from Highland to Poppy due to a lack of transmission, it was a good thing it was 2am or that would have not been possible. After big Red, as she was known, came the Cirrus. Who as nice as she was suffered from a fuel injection problem that lead to her not going when you pushed the gas and then abruptly going a few seconds later. You never had to wonder if the seat belts worked in the Cirrus as you were reminded every time the car had its delayed take off. Russ put and end to this by introducing her to a Toyota truck. Then it was Lizzy the Sebring, she might have been an old person car but she was welcoming and always smelled of leather, which to this day I still miss. But now the time had come where I could afford (barely) the GC I had always wanted. JP wasn't the first model I took home, that honor belongs to the Overland model that the dealership let me try for a weekend, but she was the one that stayed, after the dealership confirmed what I already knew there was no way I could keep the Overland. That is where JP comes in; she was the right color, had the right engine, and the right colored interior (cream colored interiors don't do it for me). So our adventure began and it has been a good run and I felt even better about JP when the 2005 GC's came out and I wasn't in love with how they looked. JP has the classic Jeep look that I think still looks fresh today. Sure the sky high gas prices of last summer might have tempted me to go looking for greener pastures but we stuck it out. That is until now. You see I was browsing around online today and found this...

...I know you can't see much but I just feel and instant connection with the 2010 GC. I am not saying that JP is on the way out, because she is not going anywhere anytime soon I hope. But I may have to find an additional source of income to bring her a sibling! We'll see if the feeling remains once all the camouflage is off.

At Any Minute:

The Yellowstone National Park Super-Volcano Could Erupt. Last time this volcano erutped about 640,000 years ago, it covered North America in a layer of dust several feet deep. It is known to erupt every 600,000 to 700,000 years, so we're bang on schedule - and, according to some scientist, global warming only makes an eruption more likely. Apparently, the caldera underneath the volcano is filling up with magma, preparing for an almighty explosion whose force, it's estimated, could be similar to 1,000 Hiroshima-style atomic bombs per second, bringing on an interminable winter in which nothing grows and most life is extinguished.

-From The Pessimist's Handbook by Niall Edworthy & Petra Cramsie

To make matters worse:

About 500 earthquakes occurred between Dec. 26 2008 through Jan. 1 2009. Three hundred of the earthquakes (including all >M2.0) have been reviewed by seismologists. There have been 86 earthquakes with M > 2.0 and 16 earthquakes > M3.0. About 200 smaller earthquakes have yet to be reviewed. Depths are difficult to determine accurately. The best located earthquakes have depths on the order of 3 to 10 km (1.8 to 6.0 miles). From Dec. 26 through Jan 2, the earthquake hypocenters appear to have migrated northwards, starting southeast of near Stevenson Island, with many of the latest events occurring near Fishing Bridge.

-According to the Yellowstone Volcano Observatory

For the optimist's out there here is some good news from the National Park Service

Q: How imminent is an eruption of the Yellowstone Volcano?

A: There is no evidence that a catastrophic eruption at Yellowstone National Park (YNP) is imminent. Current geologic activity at Yellowstone has remained relatively constant since earth scientists first started monitoring some 30 years ago. Though another caldera-forming eruption is theoretically possible, it is very unlikely to occur in the next thousand or even 10,000 years. Scientists have also found no indication of an imminent smaller eruption of lava.

Seen below are pictures of the Kilauea Caldera in Hawaii, to give you an idea of what may be coming, only much larger then what is seen here.

Snow+Driving=Bad

I hate driving in the snow. It is not that my car does poorly, JPSally rarely has any problems. No, my issue it with all the other "drivers" on the road. It seems that every time it snows each year, regardless of if its the first or last snowfall of the season, people just forget how to drive completely. You get the idiot driver who goes way to fast, guess what buddy that snow from before that melted earlier today is now ice and when you hit your brakes going 25 your not stopping right away. Also when turning you might want to consider slowing down. Yes I mean you crazy lady in the Plymouth Breeze who turned off of Ft. Union and did a 180 before coming to a stop just a few feet from the side of my car while I was waiting to turn left. Oh and the three cars that did the same thing right after you are just as bad, clearly they don't learn from example. Then you get the people who drive so slow that a semi truck loaded with hay has to pass you on the right. I am all for driving for the type of conditions that the road justifies but if you are going so slow that people are passing you on both sides its time to get off the freeway. When the speeding drivers come across the slow drivers this always results in pile ups on the freeway, which I saw three of tonight. You can tell you are one of these drivers if you find yourself facing North in the Southbound lanes, yes that means you 5 divers whose cars where smashed and facing the wrong direction. Well that's all for now, now I have to go and unwind after a stressful drive that resulted in every muscle in my back tensing up. I hate driving in the snow...with other people on the roads anyway.

Happy Birthday Becky!

Happy New Year!!

Don't worry about the world ending today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.

-Charles M. Schulz